See this shocking screenshot taken today by an unsuspecting member of the British public who had been innocently surfing religious blogs looking for the latest cassock reviews:
In particular note at the bottom left of the image Bartholomew's attempt at creating a catchy slogan for his sex pill business (under Viagra woman work) "Boing". (Bartholomew's Sex Pills: Boing? The ad agencies on London's Charlotte Street are unlikely to be quaking in their boots).
The word is out and, well, we’ve been trying to work out what on earth Barf is up to. Has he finally cracked? Too many magic mushrooms?
Bartholomew’s blog competitors – iBenedictines.org and ThinkingAnglicans.org.uk – were today too busy praying for Richard’s lost soul to pass comment. Opiniated Vicar was less charitable – “flaccid personality, flaccid blog …. frankly I always thought Richard Bartholomew and his bitter, biased blog suffered from Myccoxa-failure.”
Westminster Journal Editor Dominic Wightman (currently abroad) – who has been stalked non-stop online by Bartholomew and his partner in crime Tim Ireland for the past four years – on hearing the news about Bartholomew’s pervy shop was quoted as saying, “yuk”.
Bartholomew’s blog even advertises that he exports these genital hardeners to Canada, which Lucy Berenger of the Canadian Customs Authority has informed the Westminster Journal is completely illegal. (Bartholomew has a long history of pushing the bounds of legality so maybe this new illegal venture should come as no surprise at all. Will the authorities in the UK finally close down Bartholomew now they have some hard evidence?).
Britain’s Far Left must be reeling today. Bartholomew is one of only a handful of them who can put a sentence together.
Berenger has noted details of Bartholomew’s blog and we at the Westminster Journal have supplied her with screenshots and his contact details. We thought about sending the screenshots to the ASA in the UK but then we realised that this would just be pathetic and petty (of course if we wanted to we could email everyone Bartholomew knows about his new sex shop, even if they are in their nineties or dying from cancer, but we reserve such evil for the sickos on the extreme left of British politics who resort to such quisling tactics and then wonder why everyone thinks they’re the lowest of the low).
Pfizer does not take kindly to its pills being sold across borders by dishonest and unscrupulous individuals (aka Richard Bartholomew) and have been known to sue for millions in the past. A legal expert, who the Westminster Journal asked, commented, “It is not clear whether Pfizer’s lawyers will sue Bartholomew as it is well-known that Bartholomew is downright worthless.”
Richard Bartholomew was today unavailable for comment.
However a woman with a Suffolk accent and a stutter answered his phone saying (as best we could make out) “leave him alone … he’s with solicitor….anyways it was all for personal use. Bog off you Tory baastards. ” Then she hung up.
We decided to call just once instead of forty times (as that kind of manic behaviour would be considered stalkerish by the standards of all stable human beings).
Socialist Worker fanatic Richard Bartholomew seems to have had a tough week. He was caught loitering around the Nice Ones’ Charlie Flowers’ personal Facebook page (Bartholomew rants weekly about Flowers being a thug and seems obsessed by him) and took unkindly to a former wife of Boris Johnson liking a comment about how fat and ugly Bartholomew is (if this comment was made, this really is awfully unfair as Richard Bartholomew can’t help getting arrested for mooning every time he pops his head out of the car window and asks for directions. To be fair it is not his fault that when he sunbathes on a beach cats congregate and try to bury him with sand).
This is not the first time Richard Bartholomew has been caught up in an adult-themed scandal. A video alleged to be of him having sex with a couple of randy, buxom lasses was allegedly uploaded to the porn site TNA Flix in October 2009 which Bartholomew vociferously denied and issued a rebuttal against. (Here is a respectable screenshot below your boss won’t fire you for looking at). If indeed this was Bartholomew – and the verdict is still out - now we know why the full video lasted more than twenty minutes…..
One wonders whether Bartholomew was advised to convert his no-hope blog into a shop by his friend, the search engine optimisation trainer Tim Ireland. After all, it was Ireland who tried to sell swimshorts on the back of the “online community” he thought he had created at his website Bloggerheads. The venture was short-lived and Ireland realised that perhaps a community made up of fake ID’s and freak show visitors wasn’t really that interested in beach shorts. Religion-seekers and Viagra? The mind boggles…the Pope has enough problems on his hands.
A barmy Jubilee in Blogdom.
We all knew Richard Bartholomew, who has been the subject of manifold police investigations, was a depraved Internet pest. But a hardened criminal and sex pill-pusher? Life isn't weird; it's just the people in it.